Nostalgia

For some reason, the past few weeks have really brought out my nostalgic thoughts. I've gone through old yearbooks, passed some time with friends, and enjoyed reliving my high school days through reminiscing. Of course, I really have no desire to actually go back to those days, but thinking about them really makes me miss how simple it all was back then. Sure, we stressed about school and we worried about boys and there was drama with friends, but in the grand scheme of things, life was easy. We went to school, day after day, hung out afterwards, and in my case, participated in an astonishing number of extracurricular activities. We thought about the future, but mostly about college. We talked about getting married and having kids, but now it's actually starting to happen. We were getting older, but we weren't quite "growing up" yet.





Now, all of the sudden, my friends are getting married. Some of them are even parents! It blows my mind every time I see a new engagement or baby announcement. I just keep thinking of us as that silly group of teenagers, running around the high school barefoot waiting for our drama club or dance team rehearsal to start. Now, we're graduating from college, some from grad school, getting big kid jobs, finding life partners and having children. Suddenly, we're all grown up. I'm not quite there yet, but at the end of this year I will be out in the world, making my career and settling into adult life. It's scary, especially when I think about how easy it was to be a teenager, cruising in my '94 Jeep with the windows rolled down, blasting some indie rock music in the middle of summer with my friends piled in the back seat.





Sometimes, I miss my past. I know, though, that I need to move forward. It's funny how when we're kids, all we want is to be grown up. We want to be treated like adults and we *think* we want that responsibility. Then we become adults and it all changes. We want the coloring books and the roller blades and bubbles. I'll be honest, I still pull those items out from time to time! It's fine to reflect on those times and think about how much we've grown, but it's important not to get bogged down in them. We are who we are because of where we've been and what we've done. I do think it is healthy to acknowledge that part of ourselves. But it is time to head in this new direction toward adulthood. I want to be that adult. My grown up life is right in front of me, and I think I'm ready to embrace it.